A response from kinwove

Yes — and the Gospel writers were careful to show it.

The night before the crucifixion, Jesus tells his disciples plainly: "You will all fall away because of me this night" (Matthew 26:31). They don't believe him. Then it happens exactly as he said. They scatter. Peter, who swore he'd die with him, denies even knowing him three times. That's not cowardice alone — that's a man whose entire framework has collapsed. The one he believed in is dead, and he's not sure what he believes anymore.

Then comes the waiting. The Gospels don't linger there, but think about it: three days. Mary Magdalene goes to the tomb early on the third day not expecting resurrection — she goes to anoint a body (John 20:1). The disciples are behind locked doors "for fear of the Jews" (John 20:19). They're not hoping. They're hiding. The person who made sense of everything is gone, and they're left with confusion and terror.

Thomas gets named for this — "unless I see in his hands the mark of the nails...I will not believe" (John 20:25). But all of them felt it. They had walked with God made flesh, watched miracles, heard teachings that cut to the bone — and when it mattered most, when they needed to see it, they couldn't see anything.

What's striking is that Jesus's response to Thomas isn't rebuke. It's an invitation: "Put your finger here; see my hands" (John 20:27). Meet me in your doubt. The resurrection didn't erase the abandonment they felt — it answered it.

The disciples had to trust through the darkness too, even though they'd seen more than you have.